1. Binge Day isn't as fun as it sounds.
2. Yard work is a lot more work than it seems.
3. Oak trees are pretty great until you have to clean up after them. Like puppies.
4. Invisible splinters are the worst.
5. It's more fun to use a leaf blower if you pretend you're in Ghostbusters.
6. You may think it's nice when the guy at the plant nursery gifts your children rocks, but then you have two children with what are basically cave man axes.
7. If you think puppies and oak trees are a pain to clean up after, you haven't met my young son.
8. Sometimes, it's best to just throw a child in the bathtub and hope.
9. Stew is just as good with double the veggies, double the beans, and no potatoes. And it'll still burn the roof of your mouth right off.
10. Tupperware milk glasses from the 1980's do spectacular things when knocked into the running garbage disposal.
11. Heartsy is very dangerous.
12. Eating well and getting exercise and plenty of sleep helps the rest of my life to fall into place, like dominoes in reverse. Or oak leaves into azaleas. Stupid, bastard, jerky oak leaves.
13. Seriously, leaves and poop are currently my Waterloo.
14. I should have purchased more Trader Joe's Candy Cane Tea while it was around.
15. A sunny day can cure most ills.*
*Except the poop part. I'm going to need some carpet cleaner and an old toothbrush for that.