Hypothetical Interviewer: Out of 140 reviewers, only 19% gave Sucker Punch a positive review. Are you one of those people?
me: TOTALLY. I stand tall with those 26.6 people... or, I guess sit or crouch by the .6 person. I loved it.
Hypothetical Interviewer: What would be in your ideal movie?
me: That's like asking a four-year-old "What kind of food do you want at your birthday party?" The answer would be a whole bunch of fun fluff mixed in with reality, which would go together like pizza, bananas, hot dogs, curry, chili cheese fries, and Ding Dongs and kinda make you want to yark.
My ideal movie would contain zeppelins, zombies, steampunk elements, dance scenes, seriously kick-ass mash-up music that thumps your rib cage, strong and beautiful women, revenge, samurai sword fights, fire-breathing dragons, orcs, robots, cowboys, a mind-f*ck, and a dark and unusual, artistic world.
AND IT'S ALL IN SUCKER PUNCH.
The only things I like that weren't in there were: horses, a magnificent bastard love interest, a giant elephant, sparklepires, Robert Duvall, and the guy who played Scutt Farkus in The Christmas Story and later Annoyed Russian in the second Resident Evil movie.
So it's pretty close to perfect.
Hypothetical Interviewer: So why do you think so many people didn't like it, or worse, didn't even see it?
me: There were too many variables for your average moviegoer. It was like Kill Bill having Percocet and pizza dreams, and Kill Bill was too much, for most people. I mean, Watchmen and 300, both by the same director, went over pretty well. But Sucker Punch adds in a layer of imagination that makes *anything* possible, and most people don't like quite so many variables. And, on the surface, viewers might object to the 'young women as prostitutes' trope, although I think it made perfect sense, from a psychological point of view.
Hypothetical Interviewer: What was your favorite scene?
me: I liked the first half of the movie better than the second half, which is the same way I felt about similarly stylistic films like Moulin Rouge, Watchmen, Sin City, and 300. The later music, especially, didn't have the power of the first few songs, which was a letdown.
But as far as actual scenes go, the clockwork zombies and zeppelin scene in the previews was lots of fun.
Hypothetical Interviewer: Do you think the people actually taking the time to read this ridiculous interview would like the movie?
me: If they've read this far, yes. If they take themselves-- or film-- too seriously, then no. It's not a traditionally "good" movie.