Friday, September 3, 2010

perfect strangers 2010

me: Biscuit, what if you found a squid in your bed?

biscuit: What?!?

me: What if when we got home, there was a big, floppy giant squid in your bed. What would you do?

biscuit: I wouldn't want a squid in my bed.

me: Me neither.

biscuit: I would make him his own little bed, so he could sleep there instead.

me: You're a thoughtful girl. So you're telling me that you would let a squid sleep in your room with you every night?

biscuit: Sure.

me: Even if his tentacles draped off the bed?

biscuit: I would tell him to put his thingies back in his own little bed.

me: Wow. I can't believe you would just let this random, strange squid come sleep in your room. Would you charge him rent?

biscuit: Probably not.

me: What would you name him?

biscuit: I don't know what to name a squid!

me: How about Herman? Herman the Giant Squid.

biscuit: No, she's a girl.

me: Harriet the Squid.

biscuit: No, mommy! Harry is a boy's name! Like Harry Potter is a boy wizard.

me: Harry is a boy's name. But Harriet is a girl's name.

biscuit: That's not a very good name. I would call her Shella.

me: But squids don't have shells.

biscuit: This one does.

me: Fair enough. What would you and your squid roommate do?

biscuit: Probably play Transformers. She could be Arcee, but I'm the blue one.

me: Well, then. I, for one, welcome our new squid exchange student/overlord. But tell her to keep her thingies in her own bed.

biscuit: Okay. She will.


Alissa said...

You are an awesome mom!

Delilah S. Dawson said...

Thanks, Alissa, beta reader extraordinaire and author of The Subrosa Semesters, which is out next March!

I don't often endorse things, but I will endorse you.

K A B L O O E Y said...

I love instilling a command of the hypothetical and absurd in my kid's head too. I think we'd have a blast on a playdate together, and then our girls could talk about their weird, silly moms together. Glad to know I'm not alone.

stephanie constantin said...

I'm just curious how this conversation started!

RosyRevolver said...

Great post. You ARE and awesome mom. Taking notes over here . . .

Monkey, what if you found a llama in your bed?
(We'll see how this goes.)