Tuesday, September 14, 2010

if my head were a loaf of veal

I'm over halfway done on the next book, a humorous YA zombie/apocalypse book.

And what does that mean?

I'm writing. All the time.

Not blogging. Not taking beautiful photos. Not cooking. Not cleaning.

Not doing anything useful at all, really.

In fact, here's what I've accomplished in the last week:

* Purchased some truly heinous liquor from a liquor store, thanks to the help of a ribald group of bikers. Smelled like paint thinner, but went down pretty well with Rock Star Energy Beverage.

* Pursuant to that, got drunker than I've been in four years or so. Seem to think I told many deeply personal secrets and laughed too loudly. But we've already been invited back, so we couldn't have been that bad. Or maybe they want more secrets. ::shiftyeyes::

* Read Kiersten White's YA book Paranormalcy on my Nook.

* Got the Animaniacs theme song stuck in my head.

* Ate 5 beignets in one sitting.

* And they were really big beignets, too.

* And then I licked my pinky and snarfed up the powdered sugar and had a flashback to a very funny date back in high school where we couldn't find the receipt or the waitress and thought we'd fallen into some strange wormhole. But it was under my foot the whole time.

* Finally congealed my personal writing philosophy into one badly mangled quote from Better Off Dead.

* Watched most of House season 7 with Dr. Krog.

* Smugly decided that my spouse would look vaguely like Hugh Laurie when he grows up.

* Went to a snake party and helped my children hold a Burmese python named Peaches.

* Spent the next two days explaining why the snake wasn't named after the baby mammoth in Ice Age 3.

* And why the snake didn't *taste* like peaches or *eat* peaches.

* Enjoyed the first week of preschool, including six entire hours to myself, which I spent working.

* By which I mean getting a hair cut, shopping at the mall, writing about zombies, eating beignets, pissing off antsy crones, and reading Cassandra Clare's Clockwork Angel on my Nook.

* Saw a wild turkey standing on someone's front porch for no apparent reason.

* Twice.

* Got nearly 7 hours of sleep per night, except that night when I was drunk, when I only got 2 and dreamed I was in Groundhog Day.

* Received a really gorgeous bracelet from Etsy that I've been eyeing for months. See?

The packaging was so cool, too. It was from Amsterdam and had all sorts of ephemera and maps and tags and cigar stickers. Like a bag of weird, unreadable Christmas.

* Didn't think of a single clever thing to blog about.

...and that's about it.

Anybody done anything interesting lately?


p.s. The title is a quote from an old Kids in the Hall episode. Does anybody else remember the second half of that sentence? It will totally make my day.


Alissa said...

Actually, as far as I can tell you found a lot of things to blog about! I love that bracelet, and though I consider myself a Kids in the Hall fan I have no idea what the rest of that sentence is, but I am sure it is funny.

stephanie constantin said...

which I know it is not; How much would it cost?

you should post some pics of peaches :)

Delilah S. Dawson said...


I feel complete now. God, that used to crack me up. Please tell me you didn't Google that, that you already hold it dear to your heart.

stephanie constantin said...

nope, totally googled it...I've never even seen it...sorry! I'm a total loser, didn't you know? I spent my day making a blog for Bella's class...sigh

Anonymous said...

I also googled it, and your blog post is the #1 entry for the phrase "if my head were a loaf of veal"

I wonder what other phrases you google-dominate.

charissimo said...

I'm so glad I don't live near biegnets.

I love that you're writing!

Virginia Valerie said...

"...I"m gonna dip my balls in it!" Oh wait, that's The State. Sounds like you had a great week!

Hey and by the way, if you ever want a SLOW reader, I'm available. Just sayin. My qualifications are that I like vampires and it only took me 3 tries to finish Voyage of the Dawn Treader.

Alice Istanbul said...

Congratulations on preschool finally starting...freeeeeedom! One of these days (in about 3 weeks, once my shows are done), we should get together for a mid-morning date. I miss you.

Delilah S. Dawson said...

Alice, I miss you, too!


Charis, I've never actually met you, but I STILL miss you and want to buy you beignets.

The State was awesome as well. I miss that, too. I am a big ball of missingness.