Thursday, May 6, 2010

the good, the bad, the jabba gazzz.

I'm sure you've been waiting all day for it.*

Here it is.

me: Biscuit, let's make a book of your artwork for daddy's birthday. What should we call it?

Biscuit: It's called... it's called... Jabba Guzzz**. But it's a grown-up book for Daddy. It's not for kids, Mommy. Just for grown-ups.

me: Awesome. See? I wrote the title around it. What would you like to draw inside?

Biscuit: A tornado.

me: Well, let's draw something real, not just scribble. What would make Daddy happy?

Biscuit: A tornado.

me: What about a picture of Daddy, or a sunshine and flowers, or...

Biscuit: A tornado!

me: Anything besides a tornado.

Biscuit: This is a fish, and he is happy. He has a flower. But he doesn't eat it, because he's a fish.

me: Super cool. Now let's draw some pages for him inside.

Very nice. Looks just like him, including his weird chameleon tongue.

What else?

There were about 12 pages, and on each, I wrote what she said while she was drawing it. We had a fish pretending to be a shark, a starfish with a volcano, and Biscuit and t.rex riding an alligator that was really daddy.

Speaking of which, as promised, here's Biscuit's drawing of me, next to a drawing of an alligator I made for her.

That nasty drawing of fruit in the corner was a coloring sheet from Thanksgiving that we left on the garage floor, and it all bled together, and she decided it was a fancy watercolor painting.

In other news, did I mention that I almost burned down the house today?

It's true.

I set the pot of salted spaghetti water on the back burner.

Then I turned on the front burner.


Besides the potholder, one of two in the house, I also lost one of my top 10 possessions.

I received that Pampered Chef stoneware baker as a wedding present at my PC shower, at which there was this totally awesome Unruly Cake with a dark-haired Barbie with a cake for a dress and a cute little apron. After the party, I dumped her into a bowl and ate her.

It was awesome.

But I used that stoneware for everything, and by "everything", I mean making sweet potato fries and brownies. So, like, very frequently. It will be missed.

But I did get a new possession in the mail today, and so there's a new non-living item for me to love with the passion of a thousand fiery suns.

It's that awesome necklace by my dear friend Alice Istanbul of It's a letter "D" for "Dummy Who Almost Burns Down the House". And I lurve it.

And I'm very sick.

And that glass of wine just kicked in.

And me and Vampire Diaries are going to go upstairs and snog.***

* Thanks, Mom, for reading.

** Yeah, I misspelled it yesterday all over the blog. Whatever. I do what I want.****

*** Fall asleep snoring.

**** Said in my best Eric Cartman voice, because that episode of South Park totally cracks me up.


Alissa said...

I'm sure the books will be hit. Glad you didn't burn the house down, and too bad potholders don't taste like marshmallows.

Alice Istanbul said...

The Biscuit is such an amazing artist! I love that idea for a Daddy birthday present.

Oh, and I do that thing with the burner at least twice a day (so far I've just luckily always realized it before walking away).

PS. Glad you like your D :)

Janet said...

I did the same thing with my Pampered Chef pizza stone that I used for everything. It made me sad. I feel your pain.

Anonymous said...

I love that photo of you with the alligator!

urfaqhesse said...

He's one lucky Krog. BTW you look absolutely gorgeous.

Nelah Gabler said...

De...sorry about the potholder death. Seems like a great anniversary present (NOT) Love the Biscuits book, but would have loved to see her tornado too. I still have her pic on my door.

Jewels said...

Why does burning fabric always smell like marshmellows? Interestingly enough, my hubby melted a frying pan handle last week and it smelled like burnt coconut. weird.