1. Daddy gets up with Cleo for a marathon of apple yogurt, 1-mile hikes, and nude swimming, while I blissfully sleep until 11am and have bizarre dreams of going on a sewer cruise with one of my online forums, but I was in costume, so they didn't recognize me.
2. I wake up happy, hungry, and dead set on Jason's Deli, for some bizarre reason. So we drive there in a rainstorm and have a wonderful lunch. BLTs and strawberry shortcake are good foods for pregnancy, right?
3. Cleo, left alone for 5 minutes, undresses, takes off her diaper, poops in the little pink potty, takes the poop out of the potty, puts the poop in the old diaper, hollers for me, hands me the diaper, and then sits on the big, fluffy mattress topper that is drying in the middle of the floor. The mattress topper goes back into the washing machine, mommy washes everyone's hands with soap, and we have a discussion about what we do and do not do with poop.
4. Daddy and Cleo fall asleep, and I paint the downstairs bathroom, which has been my albatross since March. The "tan" I chose was actually vomity-pea-soup-green, and I had to quit redoing the cabinet halfway through, so it's been pretty rough in there. I am proud to say the bathroom is now officially a very harmless tan called Camel. Lesson? Camel - good. Mesa - bad.
5. Drawing on over 10 years of professional faux finishing and painting, I happily do a "crackle" faux finish on the bathroom cabinet to hide the fact that I didn't finish stripping it.
6. The "crackle" sloughs off the cabinet in big, gooey, gummy slubs. It looks like Hershey's syrup crossed with Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark. I use an entire roll of paper towels to wipe the nasty, rubbery, wet brown mess off my poor cabinet. Normally, this would really upset me, but i'm so well-rested and well-fed that I don't really care. Amazing!
7. Daddy and Cleo wake up, and Daddy decides that he wants hibachi. What a coincidence! I spend approximately 22 hours a day wanting hibachi. My mom agrees to watch Cleo for an hour, and Daddy and I have an amazing time stuffing our bellies with delicious hibachi at our favorite restaurant. Baby Shmoo approves.
So that's what I call a REALLY good day.